I’m not like you

and don’t you ever forget / it takes practice to access what you demolished / when you see us / you feel something for the first time

I’m not like you

you just like me because I’m actually interesting
all the years I didn’t know that
were rough for me
wasted so much time
thanking useless people
just because they have floor to ceiling shelving
and natural light in every room
a car in a parking garage to take them
to the end of the nearest peninsula
the history of married men
bored of jerking off into their own hands
definitely precedes me
our flesh isn’t any softer
we just moisturize
and care
and the sheen from fighting
makes us glow really nicely
having something real to fight against
is pretty hot you gotta admit
you and your spouse think it thru
you hate me and my friends
who address the world
from the vantage point of . . . you know . . .
loins . . . feelings . . . a fucking heart
and don’t you ever forget
it takes practice to access what you demolished
when you see us
you feel something for the first time
you act like you aren’t that turned on
the shit that gets you hard is a debased topic
and you prefer to keep your pages clean
read critics who describe our ideas as
“rousing” “spirited” “important” “brave”
you live with someone who sanitizes everything
even before this and definitely after
listen: let your pussy breathe
for once in yr goddamn life
it’ll be easier to come
if you don’t smell like flowers
my friends and I smell like we’ve been outside
we sweat thru the sheets
and take the bus to the beach
we want to play in the waves at the end of the islet
you’d love to rub up against me in person one day
wouldn’t you
when I tell you about that photographer
you say you’re sorry
women me like have to constantly deal
with men like that
but I know
when you go home later tonight
the details from my sordid story
are what keeps you going
no one has ever really wanted to fuck
the person they’ve merged assets with
that’s why I’m not surprised to know
you imagine me constantly don’t you
underwear bunched down by my ankles
flipped over onto my stomach
you wish you knew me better
like really actually knew me
back then
when I thought I was so disgusting
it turns out
I’ve always been interesting
not that I expected you
or your blood family to admit
everything about your fantasy life
comes from women like me
every single time you forgot your earthly problems
felt your flesh as starting point
dreamed real legit dreams
you better believe
it was me
fucking me and my friends
whose names are only uttered
when you need to feel better
and if it weren’t for us
where do you think you’d be right now?
seriously
tell me
what meaning would your life have
if we were no longer buried
under the very earth you’ve been trampling on
since the first in your line was born
and decided to stay